Wednesday, March 31, 2010

The American Dream.

Dumb Ass Banker #1: “I have an idea. Let’s give a bunch of mortgages to people who can’t afford it. Americans always want things they can’t afford. We will begin with a low interest rate to make them THINK they can afford the house, and in a couple of years the rate will skyrocket. It will make us look good on the income sheet and we can get really big bonuses and salaries.

Dumb Ass Banker #2: “That’s great, but what happens when they can’t pay it back.”

Dumb Ass Banker #1: “We will sell the loans to other Dumb Ass bankers before they fall apart. That way we can make MORE money, and have no liabilities.”

Dumb Ass Banker #2: “You’re a genius! It’ll be like a giant game of Hot Potato, and as long as we are not the ones holding the loans when everything falls apart, we can celebrate in our big Park Avenue apartment over some caviar and a bottle of Crystal.”

Person taking the loan: “I know I can’t afford this, but I WAN’T this house, and they are willing to give me the loan, so they must think I can afford it. I guess I’ll sign…I deserve this home.”

Bernie Madoff: “I am just going to lie to my investors and live it up while I can…seems easier.”

Ryan: “Oh dear…the banks failed and the stock market dropped. All the rich people now only have 20 million in the bank instead of 40 million so they need to cut back. No interior designing THIS year. I guess I’m out of a job”

There have been many cries of Socialism lately, and many cries that “Big Government” is ruining our free market economy. It true the national budget is in bad shape. It is true that our government is getting too big. But the biggest threat to our free market economy is not Democrats. It is not Republicans. It is greed.

Throughout history, the government has not been proactive in instituting controls on American people and industry. The controls that have been put into laws have mainly been a reaction to greedy people doing bad things to inflate their bank accounts. I know this, because I have Google!

EPA: Big companies figured out that they can make more money if they dump their waste in rivers and oceans. And they can save money producing goods if they use products that are harmful to peoples’ health. “Hey…by the time people figure out that we have ruined the environment, and killed them, we will have already made enough money to live the good life!”

Minimum Wage: Industries were making huge profits, and increasing production at an alarming rate. “Hey, the American people are desperate for work, and are willing to accept any offer. Let’s just keep these profits for ourselves…there are plenty of workers who are willing to do these jobs for next to nothing!”

Anti-trust Laws: Companies understood the free market. Competition leads to better quality and lower costs for consumers. “Hey…I know! Let’s buy up all of the competition. They will be happy because they get a big check, and we will be happy because we can charge whatever the hell we want. If someone needs the product, they will HAVE to buy it from us!”

Health Care: Insurance companies charge large premiums to cover the costs when their customers get sick. “Hey…I have an idea, we could make MORE money if we cancel people’s policies if they get sick. By the time they figure out that we are only protecting them if they don’t get too sick, we will have made our money” And even better, big companies like Walmart figured out they can look good by saying they offer their employees health insurance, and just leave out the part about the $2,000 deductible, which might as well be $1,000,000 when you are working for minimum wage. “Hey…who cares anyways…American’s are more concerned about getting toilet paper for 50 cents a roll than whether or not the companies they are buying from treat their employees well!”

Now I know right-wingers are going to say that I am just a bleeding heart liberal that hates rich people. This is not true. I love rich people. They are the reason I can have my career. I think that in America you should be able to make as much money as you want. So go ahead and make billions, AS LONG AS you are doing it honestly, and not at the expense of your employees and the environment.

Monday, March 29, 2010

Did you ever hear that Adam Sandler Song about his car?

I think the following is called a proof (or something like that). I learned about them at some point in my life…perhaps in college, perhaps in high school, perhaps both places. My memory involving my education is not all that clear. I know I received one, because I am pretty smart, and I have the student loans to prove it, but the details are vague at best. Anyhow, here goes what I am calling a proof:

I love cars.
I do not love my Chevy Impala.
My Impala is not a car.

What’s not to love about a 2003 Chevrolet Impala? Glad you asked!

I started to write detailed descriptions with nifty stories about the little pitfalls our transportation has given us over the years, but it was becoming a book. So here is a list of details outlining why our “car that’s not a car” sucks:

-Battery dies every night due to some electrical problem having to do with the radio.

-Radio stopped working for a while, which led to the car starting more often. I fixed the radio and now I get to jump start the car every morning...again.

-Passenger side foot area fills with about 2-4 inches of water every time we get heavy rain and park on the slightest left to right slope. The leak is near the fuse box…which probably has something to do with the electrical problem.

-The driver door creaks when I open it. Thank you to the Forest Hills’ driver who stopped his car, threw it in reverse and smashed into me!

-The front right wheel got cracked in a small winter-related accident and now doesn’t match the other wheels.

-A couple of weeks ago the HVAC stopped working, so there is no heat, air, defrost, etc.

-It has all sorts of numbers written on the windshield in various shades of crayon from the many times it was towed.

-The back right door handle snapped off a while ago. Now there is a little stump of a lever left that you have to pull up with the tips of your fingers while you pull out on the door.

-We owe about $2000 more on the loan than the car is worth.

So that is why, based on the proof, my car is not a car. HOWEVER, this mode of transportation, whatever it is, gets me to work everyday (because once it starts, it runs great). I am able to listen to Scott and Todd in the morning because I fixed the radio, and I get a healthy dose of fresh (wet) air when I roll the windows down to defog the windshield, and it is fairly affordable, assuming nothing major happens in the next two years. PS. If you are looking to buy a car in about 2 years, I have a great one for sale…near perfect condition!

Saturday, March 27, 2010

A Father learning about The Father

I mentioned in my introductory entry, that I am "sort of" a Christian. The truth is that I am a Christian, and like all Christians, I am also a human, so there are many things I have done, and do now, that are not what would be considered "Christ-like". I try to grow and learn and work toward being better with my thoughts and actions. I believe God is helping me along.

A couple of months ago, I was sitting in "cell group" which is a weekday class at our church. It is a chance for small groups to get together to learn and discuss various aspects of what it means to be a Christian. This particular evening we were discussing the Trinity (God the Father, God the Son, and the Holy Spirit). Being a relativly new daddy, I started to draw a correlation between my feelings about Lily, and what God the Father's feelings must be about his children. Lily, being new to this world, is learning new things everyday. Everytime she does something new, whether it be learning to clap, to crawl, or to say DaDaDaDa, I get an overwhelming feeling of joy. I don't care if she is advanced, delayed, or just average compared with other children, I am just so excited she discovered something new. As she gets older, she is also getting more curious.

Our living room is the home base of our lives. We have toys, TV, it is vacuumed daily, and it is a place where Lily can crawl around and play. Sometimes she tries to do something in which I KNOW she will fall, but I go ahead and let her do it. She has a little fall, she cries, and she learns not to do that again.

She sometimes gets bored with the living room, and wants to venture to new places ...like the kitchen. Now I don't know how many of you have been in our house, but the kitchen is not a safe place for an adult, let alone a 10 month old. I could name 15 things that could kill her before she even reaches the cabinet containg the "Mr. Yuck" items. Therefore, we have put up a road block of two storage cubes between the living room and the kitchen. These are roadblocks that she has figured out how to get around. I say no, she looks at me and smiles, and continues to push through, which results in me grabbing her, saying NO again, this time in a stern tone,and putting her back in the living room. She then cries a little. She doesn't understand WHY she can't go in there, but I am her Father, and I know that if she goes to the Kitchen, she will most definitely get hurt. Someday she will understand this, but for now, she has to trust me.

Now this may be a simplified illustration, but I belive God feels joy when a person learns something new about being Christian, whether they are 5 or 50. I believe God wants us to have fun. I believe God sometimes let's us fall so we can learn what NOT to do. And I believe that God puts up road blocks to really dangerous things, and if we plow through them, he will be stern with us. We have to trust that God knows what is best for us. And as we grow and learn, we will better understand what is a good way to live, where we can stay in the safety of the living room, which is a pretty fun place to be!

Friday, March 26, 2010

A Case for the Munchies

Seeing as it is Friday, and my brain is shot, this post will most definitely fall under the category “Some useless junk”. If you have important things to do, I suggest you stop reading right about now.

The other day after work, I stopped at the Taco Bell, and ordered one of my favorites: A “Crunch Wrap Supreme”. Now I don’t know if any readers have ever had the pleasure of experiencing this culinary masterpiece, so I will explain the recipe. They take their magical ground beef mixture, the tomato/onion mixture, lettuce, sour cream, and nacho cheese sauce, and they squeeze it in between two round crispy tortilla shells, covered in refried beans. As if that is not enough, they then wrap the whole thing in a soft tortilla shell, and grill it in a panini-type flat grill. Mmmmmm!

Every time I eat one of these “Joy Pockets” as I like to call them, I can’t help but think about a Taco Bell employee that was stuck working the overnight shift, got bored, smoked a huge bowl, proceeded to take every ingredient out of the little plastic buckets above his work station, and mix them together...he then took the little caulking guns and squirted the sour cream and nacho cheese…Voila…the Crunch Wrap Supreme was born. Every ingredient in the Taco Bell pantry all held together in a neat little envelope that you can eat with one hand and no mess! How else could such an unhealthy yet amazing snack have been created? A chef sure didn’t come up with it. It HAD to be someone with some serious munchies.

In California, they are discussing the possibility of legalizing marijuana. I don’t have strong feelings either way about the law. Have I used marijuana? Well, let me put it this way: If someone were to say that Ryan hasn’t not used marijuana, the statement would be not untrue. I do know that there are a lot of unhealthy things that are legal (Alcohol, Tobacco, Rush Limbaugh). I also know some really nice, intelligent people that partake in the substance from time to time. I personally have trouble accomplishing anything with just my normal brain, and I have no trouble relaxing so even if legalized, I’d probably leave it alone. So here is my only argument in favor of the law: Just think of the amazing snacks that would be created if the drug were made legal.

I told you to stop reading, so don’t blame me for the time you just wasted.

Thursday, March 25, 2010

Not a party I am headed to.

There is quite the activity going on in our country at the moment, so I thought I’d start letting my opinions fly under the category “Politics”. It is no secret that I am a Democrat, and that I support health insurance reform. That is not what this post is about. It’s a long one…I hope you make it to the end!

The other day, I awoke to Mindy telling me that Healthcare passed. I thought, “Hmmm…health insurance for everyone…this should be a pretty good thing!” When I checked my Facebook page the next day, I learned that there were many who did not feel this was a good thing. So I made a few arguments, and then after work, I did what any self-respecting Democrat would do….I turned on Fox News Radio for the ride home….WAIT…WHAT!

As a Democrat, I like to be informed, so I figured what better way to find out what the perceived problems are in the bill, than to listen to the people who are against it, and see what they have to say. I heard all sorts of good stuff like: “We need to get these MORONS out of office!”, “Obamacare will ruin our country”, “The socialist screwballs have taken our freedom away” etc, etc. My my my…those ARE compelling arguments against the bill, what a great way to reinforce your base. You have successfully turned the American people against the bill…well…at least the people who were already against it to begin with! There I was driving along, really trying to make up my mind about this legislation…perhaps even CHANGE my mind about it, and instead of hearing thoughts on why it was bad, I was being called a stupid democrat.

The next day, I tried again. I was shocked. There was actually a right-wing radio host that was giving me real information, and even some solutions. He said the bill was over 2000 pages? “Wow” I thought. “They probably didn’t read it all the way through before the vote” Then a senator called in and talked about the Republican plan to contest certain parts of the bill. “Hmmm…I can understand that. I am sure in the 2000+ pages, there are probably some things that could be altered”. I was ready to hear more. I was finally getting some specific information on the problems with the bill…and then it was time for a new show. The Hugh Hewitt show. (I think this is the same guy from yesterday).

This bill, according to Republicans is filled with junk. Un-American! Socialist! Going to destroy our country! So which one of the 2000 pages does Mr. Hewitt pick to illustrate the destruction of America?.... The 10% tax on tanning! NICE! He started taking callers.

“How much do you pay for tanning?” he asks.
“About $5.00/ session” was answered.
“NOT ANYMORE!!! Now you’re payin’ $5.50!!” says the host.

Careful Hugh…you may just sway me here…I was completely in favor of Americans being able to afford to go to a doctor…that was until you enlightened me to the fact that people are going to have to pay more for tanning. You are starting to convince me that this is a BAD THING!

He went on: “These taxes are going to put these little tanning companies out of business. The profit margins on these places are small…and the government is going to just reach in and take 10% of their hard earned money”.

That is when I immediately turned a deaf ear to Mr. Hewitt. He either purposely distorted facts to further enrage people OR he is just stupid and doesn’t understand how taxes work. Yes, they will have to pay 10% of the money taken in…but they will be collecting 10% more from their customers. It is a wash. They will not be paying any of their money to the government.

He could argue that the tax was unfair and the government was taking hard earned money from the people of New Jersey. (Fake tans…get it?)

He could argue that people will stop going to these businesses because they have to pay $0.50 more, and therefore the companies will go out of business.

He could argue that the tanning business will have to provide healthcare for their employees, and that they would not be able to afford it.

Instead, he misrepresented facts, and attempted to scare people by saying that the government was taking money directly from the business owners’ pockets…which is simply not true based on his tax argument.

Now that my little illustration is complete, I will give you my point. My problem with the Republican Party is not necessarily their conservative views. I actually agree (to an extent) that the government is getting too big. My problem is not that they oppose this particular healthcare bill. My problem is that the faces and voices of the party have no concern for making this country better. Their only concern is winning and being in power. They lie, they misrepresent, and they strike fear and anger into their followers. They do everything in their power to turn Americans against each other. (And they are supposed to be the party of “Christian Values”…that’s another post)

If you are a Republican, you should be enraged too...wouldn’t you rather have people on air representing your viewpoints with facts and educated arguments that might actually change opponents’ minds? This country has quite a few people. It has just as many opinions as people…maybe even more. There is NO WAY everybody will ever totally agree, and if the Republican Party only wants people who 100% agree with them, they are not long for this world.

Commence arguments now…I’d love to hear them!

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

I want one too!

My wife has a blog, and my sister-in-law has a blog, and Tom has a few blogs (and who doesn't want to be more like Tom!), so I decided I want one too! I have been thinking about what I wanted my subject matter to be...I LOVE cars, but that would get pretty boring for readers. I am an Interior Designer, but why would I give out design advise for free?! I need to make a living afterall. I am a father and a husband, but so are lots of people, and I really don't have anything to offer on that subject other than...do what the ladies want you to and you'll be fine!

I decided to go with Jesus Christ, Politics, and some useless stuff, and here is why:

Jesus Christ: I am a christian...sort of. I go to the best church in the world, and the messages I hear there really inspire me to be a better Christian. I have a lot to learn, and I hope deciding to write will help me along my way. Also, even though I am not what most people would call "knowledgable" about Jesus and the Bible (Although I have seen Godspell MANY times, and it is a good cliff's notes version of the New Testament), I do have some strong opinions on what it means NOT to be a Christian, and I get very angry about those behaviors being used in the name of Christ. I am sure my "Jesus Christ" entries will be full of factual errors, so it will provide a fun oportunity for you readers to set me right, and for me to learn a little more!

Politics: I have never considered myself caring much about politics, but there have been 2 occations where I went on a facebook rampage concerning politics. I guess I do care sometimes! Anyhow, the other day, I had a republican say that I had made an "Intellegent, well thought out, fact supported argument" in the health care debate. That was a big catalyst for this blog...I got a Republican to admit there may be another valid viewpoint....HOLD THE PRESSES...IM'A GONNA START A BLOG! (Just kidding...I know there are a bunch of great Republicans out there...they just don't get any press time!)

Some useless stuff: I can't be expected to have enough opinions about the previous two subjects to fill a bunch of blog entries, so this is a catch-all for when I don't feel like being serious. It will probably be the catagory with the most posts.

SO that's it. I think tomorrow I'll start with an opinion about something and see how it goes.